As I was getting dressed this morning, I thought of my father, and a joke that he loved to tell.
A man was plagued with headaches. For years he went to different doctors and tried everything, to no avail. Finally one doctor recommended something drastic, but felt certain it would cure the man: they needed to cut off his testicles.
He was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife.
When he left the hospital he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, he felt like a new person. He saw a men's clothing store & thought, "That's what I need - a new suit!"
He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit." The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see ... size 42 long." Joe tried on the suit. It fit perfectly.
He admired himself in the mirror, and the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?" The man said, "Sure." The salesman eyed him and said, "Let's see, 34 sleeve & 16-1/2 neck." Joe tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly. As Joe adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about new shoes?" The salesman eyed his customer's feet and said, "Let's see ... 9-1/2 E." The man was astonished, "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 40 years!"
He tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. The man walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?" "Absolutely!" The salesman stepped back, eyed the man's waist and said, "Let's see... size 36."
The man laughed. "Ah ha! I got you! I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old." The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. A size 34 underwear would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."
A man was plagued with headaches. For years he went to different doctors and tried everything, to no avail. Finally one doctor recommended something drastic, but felt certain it would cure the man: they needed to cut off his testicles.
He was shocked and depressed. He wondered if he had anything to live for. He couldn't concentrate long enough to answer, but decided he had no choice but to go under the knife.
When he left the hospital he was without a headache for the first time in 20 years, he felt like a new person. He saw a men's clothing store & thought, "That's what I need - a new suit!"
He entered the shop and told the salesman, "I'd like a new suit." The elderly tailor eyed him briefly and said, "Let's see ... size 42 long." Joe tried on the suit. It fit perfectly.
He admired himself in the mirror, and the salesman asked, "How about a new shirt?" The man said, "Sure." The salesman eyed him and said, "Let's see, 34 sleeve & 16-1/2 neck." Joe tried on the shirt, and it fit perfectly. As Joe adjusted the collar in the mirror, the salesman asked, "How about new shoes?" The salesman eyed his customer's feet and said, "Let's see ... 9-1/2 E." The man was astonished, "That's right, how did you know?" "Been in the business 40 years!"
He tried on the shoes and they fit perfectly. The man walked comfortably around the shop and the salesman asked, "How about some new underwear?" "Absolutely!" The salesman stepped back, eyed the man's waist and said, "Let's see... size 36."
The man laughed. "Ah ha! I got you! I've worn size 34 since I was 18 years old." The salesman shook his head, "You can't wear a size 34. A size 34 underwear would press your testicles up against the base of your spine and give you one hell of a headache."
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