Angst

When I was a kid, I didn't do sleepovers.  I had horrendous anxiety, and once the lights were out, I had such severe homesickness that it was game over.  I would lie there and panic, thinking something terrible would befall my family in my absence.

By the time I was 10 or so, I managed to gut it out - hell, I even did a sleep away camp a few different times - but it wasn't that I wasn't still anxious and homesick,  it was that I managed to overrule it with self-admonitions to grow up and be cool.

And now, thirty years later, I am starting to get that same, sick feeling where the lights just went out.

We got our girl back from Obedience School yesterday, and man oh man - I do NOT want to leave her for a few days to go to my customer site.

I may be over the whole travel thing.  I like the points, I like the miles.  I do not like leaving this baby for several days at a time a few weeks a month.

The good news is, after this trip, I don't travel again til...I'm thinking May.  And that may get cancelled because that's the CAT Conference, and the sales person in charge of that has left the building.

So, now what? 

Do I need to start looking for jobs that keep my wings clipped?  Or will that make me crazy?

Or, what?

But I ask you... would you want to leave this behind?  Ever?

Nope.  Me either.

Only this time, I can't have my friend's mother call my mother to come and get me.

ae